feels like spring.

Seated on the floor, I'm surrounded by books and lecture notes, skirts and t-shirts and bags, ticket stubs and receipts, rolls of film and memories packed in old shoe boxes. Accompanied by a mug of strong coffee and songs I'll forget. 

My attention span is wavering. I'm doing a bit of everything but accomplishing nothing in particular. If that makes any sense? Has that happened to you? It might just be me making up excuses for being lazy again. 

Deep breath.

Probably not the best way to make a comeback in terms of reviving this blog, but.. Daniela Andrade finally released her first EP! Bummed I missed out on the pre-order and special goodies. But glad there's finally a proper good quality version of her songs instead of a Youtube home-recording version.

Nights that have seen me lie wide awake staring at the ceiling, have been accompanied by her songs. Especially on days I'm just so tired and any hint of noise is just.. not a good idea. Can't choose a favorite cover, there are quite a few I love. But here's an original that I remember covering, in the wee hours of a winter morning sometime early last year. Stayed up to learn it cause the lyrics hit deep then. Got so caught up with it, it was almost therapy. Ended up sleeping with my guitar in hand. Haha. 

Let me tell you something you already know.
The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows.

It's a very mean and nasty place and 

I don't care, 

how tough you are,

it will beat you to your knees
and keep you there, 

permanently, if you let it. 

You, me, 
nobody is gonna hit as hard as life

But it ain't about how hard you hit. 

It's about how hard you can get hit, 

and keep moving forward.

How much you can take, 

and keep moving forward. 

That's how winning is done. 

When a new season creeps in, I feel obligated to change something. A different routine, a new morning beverage, a new toothbrush. Just to, well, kind of officiate the whole thing. A little odd thing I do for myself. 

I rummaged through some old untouched albums on my iTunes. Picked out new playlists. Fiddled with the customization on my phone. And then the big question I always get stuck with:

"What song shall I wake up to this time?"

I'm glad I chose this. I've laid in bed a little longer and let it ring, just to hear the song progress. It reminds me of days where things were less complicated. Nothing really made sense but that never mattered then. Days when I felt like I could conquer the world. It feels like the buildup and anticipation of spring. The carefree, almost irresponsible, promises of summer. The gentle but firm nudge to start the day, cause it's a gift, its outcome is a choice. 

books and blood

When's the last time you went to a mall with your family? 

Or would that be a bit of a nightmare for you?

Yikes. 

It's a rare occasion now that we're all scattered across the globe but when it does happen, there's always that obligatory visit to a bookshop. It always brings a smile to my face, how we instinctively gravitate to it. If we were to walk into a mall and go separate ways, I think we'd each most likely end up in a bookstore at one point, if not all at the same time. I remember my first visit to one of the biggest malls in KL, hearing stories from my friends about how its impossible to really explore it in a day. I was excited, knowing I'll find something I'll actually like. 

And then that big mistake we all made. 

After just an hour of wandering around, we found the bookshop.

There goes an entire afternoon. I'd pick up a book, get engrossed after a chapter, try to tear myself away but end up reading another chapter and then:

No! I have to find my parents. Wait, where did my little sister go to? Kids section? She's not there! I hope she's with mum. Oh hey, I see my brother. Comics. Pfft. Typical. Oh isn't that the new bestseller? Hmm. Let's check out just a chapter.. Wha- Who's pulling on my shirt?!

My big sis will say my dad's looking for me. We find him and he's reading a book on politics, or was it a business-something-thingy? And he tells us to wait, this book might just come in handy one day. It has some really good points. 

I get bored waiting. I spot another book and pick it up. 

Dad is done. 

Too late. I'm lost in the book. 

And it goes on. Oh, I miss these little things about my family. Despite all the fights and misunderstandings and misery we've put each other through.. I guess it's true what they say. 

Blood runs thicker than water.

"As you get older, you'll see. Some friends you will keep. Some friends you will lose. People come and go. It's hard, it's life. But your family, they will always be family. They will always be there. Don't forget that." - GK Menggu